Nine Months Old today

Wow who would have guessed your little man could grow so fast? Each day it seems as if he is learning new things. I can't beleive that he is just about ready to start crawling when it seems like he should still be the little boy in my mind. Sometimes I find it hard that I miss alot of the first but than I think of all the joy it brings his parents.

First phone call with Birthfather since Birth.

Okay so every month on this day I become an emotional basket case and the reason being is on this day I gave birth to my son and was hit with reality that he was not coming home to me. I do not regrete my choice to place him. I just question all the events involved.
Today I had the chance to talk on the phone with my sons birthfather. Now this is the first time since my son was born. Lots of emotion involved. But most of all I felt his pain and I felt the grief that he was suffering. Now I am not saying that I know exactly what he is going thru as he is on a different side of the adoption that I am. But I know what its like to miss my son so much that it hurts and there being no one to turn to who truely understands. It was so nice to talk to someone who truely understood what I was saying and ment it. I know those I do talk to about my sons adoption mean well but its just some how different when they have been in your situation. Don't get me wrong I know one conversation doesn't make everything better, but I do hope that it is a start of a friendship that will make thing easier for our son to understand when he gets older. I just want everyone to be happy and get along, but then I know we are all human and make our own choices. I just want to be able to tell him all I know about our son and have peace in doing so.